Jesus Loves You!

Hello, Daddy. Thankyou for the ticket to Heaven(:

BabyDaryl can now walk very stably now.
When i came home after school, i saw BabyDaryl walkin' from the living room to my room.
I can't help but smile whenever i see this small 'lil boy walkin' around clumsily.
He was walkin' towards the bed when he got a trip and fell down.
Before he hit the floor, Mommy rushed towards him and grabbed hold of him.
In that few seconds, several images flashed through my mind.
I remembered how Jesus had fallen down while carrying the cross
and how his earthly mother rushed over and helped him up.
My heart was filled with warmth.
We too, had our own share of falls.
Many times, we can easily just pick ourselves up.
However, there are also times when we can't stand up.
Sometimes, we don't even wish to.
When no one was there to help us up , we grumble and groan.
However, when there is someone there to pick us up,
how many times do we thank them?
how many times do we tell them that we appreciate them doing so?
Do we thank them as much as we grumble and groan when there isnt anyone?
That.. definitely got me into thinkin'..

谢谢你们的微笑
谢谢你们的话语
谢谢你们的鼓励
谢谢你们的推动力
谢谢你们让我坚强
谢谢你们所给我的欢乐

谢谢你们陪我熬过人生的黑暗
谢谢你们陪我走过人生的那段艰苦的路
谢谢你们陪我跨越高山
谢谢你们让我的生命如此的美丽与充实
谢谢你们让我相信明天

因为你们，我笑了
因为你们，什么困难，什么害怕，
都会从我眼前消失
因为你们，我会紧握着我手中的一切
因为你们，嘉宜会努力的(:

I dreamt of Mas Selamat last night.
Yesyes, go ahead and laugh. Dont ask me why, I dont know. I woke up in the morning , perspiring all over and still shocked over the dream. I dreamt that I actually spotted Mas Selamat, and being such a kind civilian, I started giving chase. But in the end, I ended up getting chased by him 'cuz he wanted to kill me =.= Sounds very ''cartoon'' but it was really scary at that point of time. I even had the urge to wake Daddy up to send me to school. Come to think of it, it's quite funny eh? Haha.

School was awesome! I enjoy going to school , really. I can go mad everyday together with the clowns in my class. School without them is such a bore. Thank you all Hunks and Babes in 5N3(:
You people always make my day(:

Whatever happened to my Dmm?

First, JoyceTan was sick.
Then it was Celine's turn
Then it was Xinru's turn
Then it was Vivien's turn
Now's my turn

All within a few week's time.
God ahh. Grant us strength !

Joan has been sleeping for the whole afternoon today.
I am sick. I missed school today): Guess I'm just physically drained. Hope I'll be fine by tonight. Yinkay said the class was quiet without me. (Meaning i'm noisy la?) Haha

Mommy and Daddy was home yesterday(: It's so rare for the both of them to be at home at the same day due to their heavy load of work. Yes, I was happy(: Glenn came over at nine for tutoring. He's one intelligent but lazy boy. I enjoyed tutoring him.

Yishun Sec has completed CG08! Yay! However, we'll continue to work even harder for the sister's side to hit a caregroup size, at least. Thank God for everyone((:

School has been enjoyable as well(: So far, everything seem quite smooth for me. However, i'm also prepared for the tests that God will give. 'Cuz it'll do nothing but grow and benefit me(:

I never thought you'd be so tired
I never thought so..

I had taken your goodness for granted.
I had taken advantage of everything that you gave me.

You're no longer that young. You're no longer that energetic.

I'd always complained that you don't understand me.
But I did not take that step to understand you either.
How ironic.

Years passed
and then i realized
how much i've grown and
how much you've grown

Many things changed
But you never stopped contributing
You had never stopped loving

I never had the guts to tell you
how much i appreciated you
how much i'm grateful to you
how much i want to thank you for all that you gave
how much .. i love you.

To see you curling up in pain really breaks my heart

Mommy .. You'll be well
I've just prayed for you.
My God above will make you well..

Happy Birthday SunShine !!!!

It's Sunshine's One-Year-Old Birthday today(: That's the shirt that i've bought for him last evening when i went out with Siying to buy some stuff. It has a big denim Mickey head behind (: Mom said it was Old-fashioned but everyone else said it was niceeee.

Currently, the adults are happily playing mahjong while my that irritating ahemmmm i mean , beautiful cousin is sitting right beside me now . So i'd better say some good stuff or else she'll wring my head off my neck.

That naughty boy has caught lotsa attention from everyone. He walked even more compared to the days before. Even when mom carried him to bathe , he's got three people choosing what clothes he should wear. (Cousin , Uncle and I ) So big shot. Hahaha. Baby just cut his Birthday cake just now(: Yumyumm. He looked so blur, I doubt he knows that it's his Birthday today. He's just One anyway.

Dearest Jogina

We first knew each other on 111206

I didnt know that day was God-planned

for us to know each other

It's been a year plus

But i feel like i've know you forever

I've got no much to say

You know how i feel and how i think

Though this period of time is considered pretty short

but it seemed like we had gone through quite a lot

You know how people say good friends compliment one another

They seemed to replenish whatever stuff that are lacking in the other party

I like how it sounds

that we compliment one another

Just like pieces of Jigsaw puzzles fixing nicely with the others.

There were also rough times that we faced

Times when we rubbed against each other's shoulders

Times when we stepped onto each other's toes

Times when we wanted give up

But they say that it's part and parcel of a true friendship

Still, we managed to cling on to each other

and made the best out of everythin'

Sure, who said it was easy ?

But when i look back

i couldnt help but smile

I am glad that we had held on to each other's hands

and walked through the storms together

I am glad that I have you

and you know that I love you

Thankyou dear

for just letting me rant at times when i didnt feel that good

for just keeping silent and hearing me out

for just accepting me as how I was created to be

and for just loving me

Together, we'll continue keeping this friendship strong

I know you're with me

When didnt you not?

Happaye Happaye!! (:

We had 6 free periods today(: 4 Math periods, 2Combined Humanities periods and 2 English periods. Surprisingly, the class was pretty quiet, doing their own revision and stuff.

I wanna buy books!

Talent is never enough- John C. Maxwell
Our little secret- Duncan fairhurst
Songs of the humpback whale- Jodi Picoult
Faith- Jodi Picoult

Now i know why people always say ''Monday blues, Monday blues..''

Firstly , I was supposed to wake up at 6.05am but the alarm clock didnt work so I ended up waking at 7am. If Daddy hadn't came into my room and wake me up, I guess I would still be sleeping soundly till afternoon. Secondly, I had washed my shoes and forgot to tie my shoe-laces the night before so i gotta rush it. Joan suck at tying shoe-laces , that's for sure. It takes me 'bout 10mins. Thridly, I gotta carry a really heavy school bag plus a box (the one people use in photo-copying shops) due to countless of files and textbooks that i have to bring back to school after the holidays. What's worse was that , i gotta walk reeeaallly fast to school so as not to be late. You could imagine, by the time I reached school, I could almost fall flat on the ground.

Prayermeet with North at Yishun Stadium was really refreshing. I teared a lot.

Was supposed to tutor Shawn's younger brother but i was late though i tried rushing back. I feel so bad. Hope he's coping well.

Right.

I did not stomp off from istana park out of anger. I needed to rush home like real fast. Joan is fine. However, i dont deny that i was angry la. Just many many many problems surrounding me. Sorry Joyce, i shoved you aside, i didnt mean it. I guess this is the first time i'm so mad in my entire life. Haha. I felt really down. Like in the deepest deepest pit. In the journey home, I had a loooonnnngggg heart-to-heart conversation with God.

Joan: ''God , I thought you promised me that you'll never give me anything that's too heavy for me to bear? God, it's really choking me. It's so suffocating.''
God: ''I look highly on you, My child. When did i ever go back on my words? You can pull this through.''

There's a patch of grassland with tress just opposite khatib bus-stop which i've always thought that it's quite beautiful. I was sitting there, waiting for the bus. Then God spoke again.

God: ''All these creations are created by me. I am the creater and I had created everything in this earth. I , too , have created you. ''

I was dumb-founded.
I went speechless.
God's voice was in me throughout the entire journey.

Still, I did not speak. I went home with a heavy heart , it weigh like tons. Got home , went to the washroom and started bathing. After a short while, i just broke down and cried my whole heart out. Like, really cry out. This is the first time im crying out to God. Most of the time, it's just those silent cry. Just tears streaming down my cheek but this time was entirely different. I went like ''God...God..God...'' I knew i did not have to say much because God knows and understands everything. My whole heart just went out for Him and no, im not exaggerating. And i had experienced something really really really amazing! I shall not reveal until my teaching for the girls this saturday. You girls would be awed, im sure(:

''Come live in me

all my life

take over..

Come breathe in me

and i will rise

on eagle's wings''

Metamorphosis was awesome! I went there with a heavy heart, i could say. Mommy was complaining and stuff. She doesnt like me to go out in a rainy weather, I dont know why. Perhaps she's worried that I would catch a cold, get drenched or somethin' like that. She even said some stuffs that arent that pleasant to the ears. O well. I guess all Moms in the world's practically the same. I still love her, though. Haha! Anyway, that few hours in Church wasnt enough luh! I want more, I want more! Love praising and worshipping God. The whole atmosphere's indescribable. To see those hands raised highly just to seek God's presence. To hear God whispering in my heart, ''Iloveyou, My child.'' Though it was inside me, the voice was so distinctive and clear, it was as if it was echoing throughout the entire auditorium(: God indeed, never fails to awe me.

Have been doing lotsa Comprehensions and Vocabulary for the past few days. English is just so interesting!

I am really starting to miss school a lot! My clique, especially. Siying, Bengte, JinQiang, Liyan and shahrul! Ohmy Ohmy. It's not even one week and i'm missing you guys like @!#~@#$!$%. You guys brightens up my day each morning when i see you all in the parade square for morning assembly(:

And lastly, a short prayer:

''FatherLord, please give me wisdom, knowledge, understanding and even joy when it comes to studies. Help me understand and see the values behind all this, especially when it comes to irritating Math equations and figures which makes my head spin and resulting me in having the urge to tear my hair out. Help me to love Math, though it makes me go bonkers most of the time. Help me to persevere on till the end of this year. I do not only want to pass it, but ace this big 'O' as well. Allow me to shine not only in Ministry but in studies as well.

Lord, i also want to thank you for the fruits and blessings that you've poured down all this while. Thankyou for revealing yourself and making yourself so evident in our lives. We want to continue seeing people stepping forward to acknowledge you. We are ready, in fact, desperate to be used by you. Use us as a mouthpiece. Use as as an instrument. Talk to others through us, O God. Give us indomitable courage and spirit when it comes to evangelising. Soften their hearts and our hearts as well. I thank you in advance. Iloveyou. In your precious name i pray, Amen(: ''

Okay, it isnt that short after all(:
Keep my group and I in prayers, people(:

Right. I shall post something before i hit the books.

Uncle Gerald's been pretty concerned about my studies. He even initiated to help me map out my whole schedule for the next 5-6 months before the big 'O', and is tutoring personally for my languages. He would even try to find a tutor for my math and science. Daddy and Mommy had never really bothered with my studies ever since i started education. Partly because they dont wish to stress me out. Yeah, some of you guys might be going ''waaa so good..'' . But seriously, it isnt that good after all. I met up Uncle Gerald yesterday. He wants me to study for at least 2 hours a day, which i agree isnt too much to ask for. In fact, ask any student who's sitting for their O's this year and they'll tell you 2 hours are not enough. I am really happy that i've someone to seek for help when it comes to education but i guess i really gotta work real hard. Uncle Gerald told me that if he do not see any improvement, especially in my math, i gotta quit committing to church. So yes , let's pray for the ''zero-self-disciplined-joan'' to really bang her head hard on the wall and start cracking.

来，给joan一点爱的鼓励！
clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap !

Last night while i was studying in the kitchen, i heard Sis and daddy clapping and cheering on. I went out and guess what i saw? I saw BabyNephew taking his first step(: Many steps, in fact. Eleven more days and he'll be one year old already(: Ohmy. Time really do fly. I still remember the night when Daddy and I rushed to the hospital to see the very first sight of that 'lil prince. The milky skin and biggie eyes. I remember the very first evening he came back home and i laid my hands on him and prayed a 'lil prayer, thanking God for this precious life and hoping that he'll be saved when he grows up. I still remember how tiny he used to be. Put him on the bed and he'll look like a pea. I still remember always patting his back after each and every milk-session, just so he wouldnt puke and all. I remember how he would pee on others when changing of diapers. Now this little boy knows how to stretch his arms to let you carry, point at the remote control, asking you to give it to him, throw whatever pillows and bolster out of the playpen and says ''BangBang!''. I am really glad that i was there, watching his every ''firsts'' in life (:

Im dedicating this post to my beloved sheep, Melissa Tan Shi Min Faith (Far left)

My oh my. I looked at this photo and i went speechless for a few seconds. I never knew or realized how time could fly this fast. I always hear people say ''Time flies, time flies..'' but i never really got to experience it. Now i do.

You were my first sheep. I was reluctant to becoming a shepherd simply becuz i couldnt see myself taking care of someone. However i really thank God for giving me you as my first sheep. You never gave me problems. You are open with corrections. You are always understanding and patient with me.

Thankyou for all your cards and letters. Those words of encouragement and affirmation really spurred me on throughout this entire race, i have absolutely no idea how to thank you enough.

X29 camp was one of the memorable moments i have with you. After singing ''I love this family of God'' , you came towards me, arms stretched widely and gave me a hug. We held on to each other so tightly, i thought we could both vanish into thin air. It wasnt really the hug that touched me. It's those words, my dear. When you told me with that shaky and trembling voice of yours then that you loved me and that you could never do without me. Do you know what? The thing was, i didnt do much. I simply just stood there, encouraged you, spurred you on and gave you a slight push when you needed it. You overcame practically everything by yourself. Yes, indeed you've had your falls. However, you've stood tall throughout it all. It's just such a pleasure to see you grow from a timid shy little girl to one who dares to step out to share the gospel and is so crazy about God.

Joyce told me you're gonna move on to tertiary and for that minute, i just felt nothing. I had expected it coming. But i never knew that it's that soon. Another challenge was how to break the news to you.

Then came the day to tell you the truth. We've all expected this to come. But i guess somehow we both tried to shove it aside and carry on as though no change would take place. I prepared no script. I just broke you the news, tell you when's gonna be your last service, told you how thankful and grateful i am to you. I never expected myself to cry. For a few minutes, we just sat there, wiping away our tears, hoping somehow that we could wipe away this truth as well.

Till now, to tell you truth, i still have not let this news sink into me as yet. You are my first sheep, and the first to leave me after all. The thought of not having you so frequently by my side just seem to have a giant crater in my heart. It's God's calling. We gotta obey. You gotta move on. God has the best plans for both you and i. So just grit your teeth for a 'lil while and you'll soon understand.

Thankyou for tolerating my self-praise
Thankyou for accepting me right from the beginning
Thankyou for your words

Thakyou for your gifts
Thankyou for your hardwork

Thankyou for loving me

Thankyou for serving God so fervently

Thankyou for growing so much in Christ.

Thankyou for you.

Darling Dear, just like there are many commas in our lives, this is yet, another comma. It isnt a full-stop yet. Not so soon. You're gonna continue to shine and have countless of breakthroughs in life. You're gonna blossom like you never ever thought you could. Continue to stand strong and i'll assure you that you're gonna be okay.

Here's my promises to you.

If you ever feel like you're walking a path alone, which you most probably wouldnt becuz you have God,

call me and i'll be there to hold your hand and walk with you.

If you ever need someone just so you could pour out your sorrows and confide in,

im gonna be there.

If you simply just long for a presence of someone,
turn back,

you'll see me with arms widely stretched out.

I promise.

Lastly, I've wrote to you countless of times but i never got the courage to say it to your face.
Sheep, Iloveyou..